Just this day.

There is nothing to dedicate 1,000 words to. CRAYONSEED beat me to it.

There is only the monetary preparation required to acquire the absolute brick wall avalanche of games coming in the fall.

But before that.  I think its worth it to mention the ultimate demise of professional basketball.

We will keep it short.

It starts with a simple concept. Star players get outrageously dubious foul calls. Kobe Bryant’s defender will foul out. Tim Duncan’s defender will foul out. Dwyane Wade’s defender will foul out. The complexities arise when the refs become self-conscious of this rule and try to balance it out with equally outrageous foul calls for the other team. I believe they try to keep score. So for every nonsense call a Kobe Bryant or a Lebron James will get a non-star player on their team will get an equally ridiculous called on them.

A dumb system? Incredibly.

But a system nonetheless. The major problems arise when the refs lose track of who is getting the calls and not. Without their handy scorecards, the refs begin calling everyone for random things and no one for anything at the same time (i.e. Trevor Ariza will never get a foul called on him for standing on Hedo Turkoglu’s head as he dribbles up the court, but if Kobe Bryant is successfully defended then someone must be fouling him).

The big problem that arises is rhythm.

Or lack thereof.

The same broken rhythm that ruins games destroys professional sporting events.

The NFL had this problem in 2007 but fixed it.

The NBA has this problem and even though everyone hates it the NBA itself prefers to look the other way. And whistle. Then start going “LALALALA”. Then turn on the television. Then go into the bathroom for 5 hours.

Hence, this is probably my last season of caring about professional basketball at all.

Speaking of rhythm, I’m particularly looking forward to the “Mark and Execute” feature in Splinter Cell: Conviction. In a nod to the immortal Jack Bauer (literally … Chinese torture and mysterious disease in 3 seasons?), the ability to burst into a room and deliver 5 headshots in a row with your handgun has been implemented.  Some are worrying about this affecting the ease of the game.

And they are right. But for the wrong reasons.

Sam Fisher is the best. The clunky control scheme afforded his stealth antics do not do him justice. They needed to open him up a bit (BASKETBALL ANALOGY WARNING. HELMETS ON!) and get him out in the open floor. Ubisoft used the term “the ultimate predator” in the description. The ultimate predator would have to be someone hunting you who DOESN’T NEED TO. He could just walk into the room and shoot you in the right nostril from 85 feet away but doesn’t and prefers to stalk your movements and attack by suprise. You have no chance in the encounter and the persuer has a walk-in closet of options with which to dispatch you.

So “the Ultimate Predator” is actually a very good idea. And how many games do they expect me to be hiding in the shadows with the same guy anyway?

Speaking of good ideas.

Mag is still not a good one.

Pushing shooting games on the PS3 with its horrid analog stick situation is also a poor idea.  Why not try to clean up on the niche market?

The original Xbox handled the shooting and the murder.

The PS2 handled everything else.

That goes back to an earlier belief that upon the announcement of the Playstation 3, Sony should have locked up all of their non-FPS and Japanese exclusives immediately no matter the cost.

But alas Sony is an arrogant monarch.

Another arrogant monarch?

Zeus.

He who apparently didn’t think this son would rip off someone’s head to prove a point.

A point made in what is shaping up to be the most violent videogame ever made.

God of War 3.

And I’m not going to end that statement with a “but its going to be cool”.

I saw a cyclops get its eyeball ripped out and gritted my teeth.

Not in the “GRRR SO IMPACTFUL AND AWESOME” way (like when you hit an African with a missile in Resident Evil 5) but in the “GRRR I have to look because I’m grown and I can’t turn away I’M 26 GODDAMNIT!” manner usually saved for drill-to-eyeball contact in gore porn movies like Hostel.

Speaking of gritted teeth and squinted eyes.

What is this?

CRIMECRAFT? What?

I’m sorry but I now have to compose graphicswhore.com’s very first LOList.

Here I go.

Lol @ “Hear the sound of the ghetto in this gritty gameplay.” (right below the movie itself)

Lol @ playing as Eminem from 8 Mile.

Lol @ the bright red gun Eminem is sporting.

Lol @ the gritty hip-hop beats playing in the background.

Lol @ at the broad with no pants Eminem blows away at the end.

INDEED!

Speaking of laughing a bit.

I was going to  comment on the new 1 v 100 craze that is gripping Xbox Live (and really gaining a few paces on the PSN which was already a distant 2nd) but frankly my girlfriend hit the nail on the head.

And one more thing.

Review embargoes are stupid.

My purchasing of Prototype is heavily delayed because reviews are blocked from a game everyone seems to love intensely.

“The manliest game ever made.”

“I’ve never seen shit hit the fan so hard in my life.”

ETC.

So why block reviews?

Oh well more time to practice getting my arm broken in UFC.

And FINALLY.

Soul draining financial burden comes in the form OF:

Batman

Mass Effect 2

Modern Warfare 2

Tekken 6

Uncharted 2

Bayonetta (please look at this movie)

Ratchet and Clank

Splinter Cell

Anything else I am missing please add in the comments section.

Its never too early to prepare.

-A.